WHEN BIG GIRLS CRY: The pain behind every smile

“It’s personal, myself and I.”

The lyrics linger longer than the melody when they really hit you and seem to be narrating your own story. Each word echoes the quiet moments you keep to yourself and the stories you never share.

Sometimes, courage hides quietly. Like for a woman who has learned to carry the weight of the world while smiling through her own battles.

That kind of courage was seen when Rufa Mae Quinto impersonated Fergie and performed “Big Girls Don’t Cry”—not just for entertainment, but as a reminder of the quiet resilience women hold within themselves.

For years, we knew Rufa Mae Quinto as someone who could turn any stage into a playground of joy, full of comedy. The one who made us laugh so hard, whether in movies or as a guest on TV shows. And with her iconic “Go, go, go!” she became the comedian we grew up with—the one who could really brighten up the moods of viewers.

But for one night, we saw the different side of Rufa. She carried every emotion onto the stage, doing her best to hold herself together as she shared her heart through every note of the song.

“And I’m gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I’ve got to get a move on with my life

It’s time to be a big girl now

And big girls don’t cry.”

Each line felt heavy with meaning. There might be a reason for every pause between notes, doing everything to hide it well. And after she finished, the tears suddenly came.

She joked, “Ang taas kasi, kaya naiyak po ako,” a line that revealed something, that let the people feel the vulnerability and the weight she carried into that stage.

For a woman who has made a career from laughter, allowing herself to cry in public truly showed bravery. Rufa Mae’s performance was more than a song; it was a quiet reminder to all. 

Women do cry. Women do hurt. Women do reach their breaking point.

They just learn how to keep going while hiding the pain they feel. And maybe that’s what being a “big girl” really means. Not by keeping your tears, but by finding the courage to keep going. Crying is not a weakness; it is proof that we care and endure.

So to every woman who has felt unseen, overwhelmed, or forced to be strong: let yourself cry, let yourself feel, and let yourself grow. Because the bravest thing a woman can do is simply to let her heart be heard.